Movie time...Or not

Fig-Hey Frag! Do you know what we get to do tonight??

Frag-Um, no. What do we get to do?

Fig-We get to go on an adventure. We get to traverse some of the most dangerous terrain know to modern man! Then we get to make our way through crowds so thick that you don't have to stand on your own two feet!

Frag-What the hell are you talking about?

Fig-...And then we get to be willingly swindled out of hard earned money, and frustrated to no end!

Frag-I am still trying to figure out where you are going with this...

Fig-We are going to...*scary music*...The Movies!

Frag-Oh no, is it really that time of the year again?

Fig-Yep. When all of the overpriced, over-told, over everything movies hit the big screen.

Frag-The only problem is that everything has already been done. There are no original movies anymore. The popcorn is stale and the prices just keep going up!

Fig-But you are paying for the experience! The stadium seating, the cup-holder arm rests, and the cute little boxes of candy!

Frag-No. What I am paying for is to have my seat kicked by some snot-nosed punk who has no sense of personal space, some idiot who feels that the 'Please turn off your status symbol' message doesn't apply to them, and people who think it's a great idea to bring a 2 year old to the latest showing of a scary movie.

Fig-But, but, I thought you loved the movies?

Frag-I do love movies. But I really don't like going to the theater to see them anymore. I don't like having to take my own life in my hands trying to find a parking space, I don't like the fact that people don't exercise any type of sense when it comes to bringing their kids. I like going to later movies because then I could at least be somewhat assured that it would be free of kids that were under 15.

Fig-So what are you saying? Are you saying that you are going to give up on going to the movies?

Frag-I think I might. I am just fed up with the atmosphere in the theaters anymore. Hollywood has gotten lazy, and I am tired of paying for the same Micheal Bay movie over and over again.

Fig-I miss the cartoons.

Frag-That's another thing! Who here remembers when they showed cartoons before the movie? Now all they show are ads and previews. If I wanted to watch commercials I would keep my ass at home! For me the act of going to the movies has become so unpleasant that I don't mind waiting for a show to end up on DVD.

Fig-But what about the popcorn?

Frag-Ya know, they make these wonderful things called...Popcorn poppers! And yes, you can even buy crappy butter-like oily stuff at the grocery store. What's your excuse now?

Fig-I, uh, I think mayb...maybe the next time will be better?

Frag-I doubt it...